I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
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