woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
