I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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