I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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