I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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