Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Randomize
