I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
