I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
