k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize