I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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