I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize