OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
