cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
