Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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