You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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