So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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