I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
you never un-have a 4some
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I enjoy the company of your penis
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
