can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
