i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
