She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
