idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
