If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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