weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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