Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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