It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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