I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
How external is "for external use only"?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Randomize