So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
