I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
