Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
its liver damage thursday
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize