and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
