Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
