your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
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