I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
