How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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