If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I know her cup size but not her name....
Two words: nipple clamps
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