how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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