it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
