your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Randomize
