i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
