Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
