Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
