do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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