Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
40s are totally the cure
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
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