No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
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The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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