her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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