I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
