There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
