Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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