You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize