How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
