She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
